Mac Eagan! You have been Thorned!


A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, a Thorn by any other name, is still…a prick.

Mac Egan!  You shoulda known better!  You have been thorned!

For the uninitiated, “Thorning” is the act whereby I take your private emails to me, and decide that they really need to be broadcast without your consent to the entire world.  Tis my duty.  And I would be remiss in my duty if I did not post the email that accompanied Mac Egan’s entry as a finalist into our contest You Didn’t Write That.

Here is what Mac confessed, followed by his entry.

“Dear Thorn

I know I have in the past viewed these writing challenges as the literary equivalent of Iron Chef, with you as the “beloved chairman.”

Most of the time my initial reaction to the prompts is apprehension, feeling as Bobby Flay or Masaharu Morimoto does when they are handed a jar of dill pickles and told, “Here – make these into an appetizer, an entree, some side dishes, a dessert and a tasty drink.”


But this prompt?  This was more like receiving a five-pound bag of all-purpose flour!  So . . . ordinary . . . so common . . . so impossible to work with due to the endless possibilities.


Hopefully I have risen (get it?  Flour?  Risen?) to this challenge.


Mac Eagan”

Rising to the occasion should be the yeast of Mac’s worries.  But you might say he rose to the occasion.

And here is Mac’s entry into our contest:

It’s a wonderful day in the neighbor hoodie

Tag, Still Not It


Mac Eagan

Luis pushed through the doors of the police station and had his cell phone dialed before he reached the bottom of the concrete steps.  With his free hand he pulled his hoodie up to protect himself from the cold night air.

“Why don’t you listen, huh?  Did you forget what I told you about copying my tag?  Did you?  You were supposed to use Persian Blue, not Egyptian.

“Nah, it don’t matter, anyway.  Lasko’s lazy.  He won’t try to build a case just on a tag.  Yeah, I’m heading there now.”  Luis checked the phone’s clock and broke into a jog towards the bus stop.

Luminess slid into a booth at the diner and traded fist bumps and palm slaps with Streaker, Handz, and CoCo Charlie.

“We still on?” Streaker asked.

“Definitely,” Luminess answered.  “I gave Lasko too much credit. We’re safe unless he catches us with paint on our hands.”

“He’s lazy,” chimed in Charlie.  “He prolly can’t even tell the difference between Egyptian Blue and Persian.”

“Shut it,” snapped Luminess.  “You screwed up.  Charlie’s right, though,” he said to the others, “and this changes everything about the plan.  We won’t need decoys.”

“So, when?” asked Handz.

Luminess pulled out his phone as he answered.  “Tomorrow night.”

The booth filled with ringtones and alerts.  The three guys looked at the image of Luminess’ preliminary sketch displayed on their screens.  There was no doubt Luminess had the soul of an artist.


“South wall of the Art Museum.  It’ll get assigned to Lasko.”



15 thoughts on “Mac Eagan! You have been Thorned!

  1. Michael Stang says:

    What is it with Atlanta?  Tags as wonderful as the graphic; Lasko should retire.  Great dialog within, Mack, showing off a talented writer’s way with words.  Love to hear where “prolly” came from.  It is the whole theme of this that strikes me.  The organization of art-characters just part of the show.  You do this often.  Reading your work is peeling an onion.  Ever watch Flay slice one?  Amazing. Good luck with the contest. I can see I am in the shark tank.

    • Mac Eagan says:

      I don’t know the details of how “prolly” came to be – I only know I have seen it used on Facebook by persons who otherwise show themselves to be users of slang and speech shortcuts.  I always kind of assumed it was just an attempt at spelling phonetically what they heard others saying.
      Thank you for your kind words.

  2. Mac Eagan says:

    Wow, Thorn, thanks for the great photo!  Did you go all the way to Denmark for that or just ask Morgan to snap a pic and email it to you?

  3. KYLE says:

    When Lasko appears on the scene, his broadway of supporting characters certainly make you think about what Lasko is doing in the moment. Is he really lazy?  I envision Lasko, feet up on desk, reading a copy of Life magazine, enjoying a cigar in his office, because his wife won’t allow it in the house.(even though he wasn’t physically in this story) Point being, I never think of you as the creator of these fine stories. You are in Lasko’s precinct and when it goes down, he will release the Dobermens…and the Iron Chef! 

    • Mac Eagan says:

      This story is, of course, a continuation of my ‘You didn’t write that’ entry.  My intended ending for that story was to have Luminess make the phone call that begins this story, showing he was actually responsible for the vandalism at the Art Museum.  I was glad to be able to continue that story here.
      The fact that you read my stories and don’t think of me in the process is, to me, high praise.  As long as readers think of me afterwards, I am happy.

  4. Tlrelf says:

    I haven’t read a tagger story for quite some time. . .I’ve heard “prolly” before. . .

    So, good show, Macman!

    Did I mention Thorn knows how to read aloud?

  5. Tisha Jones Deutsch says:

    Durrr – here it is! Thanks. Too much vodka, I suppose. Your story was really easy to visualize – it had a nice flow and colorful dialogue between colorful characters. Although most people despise it, and I think I’m supposed to also, I’m kind of a fan of graffiti. Some of those artists are extremely talented! It can be beautiful. You made me want to see your guys’ work. I am a fan of your writing as well.

    • Mac Eagan says:

      Who says you are supposed to despise graffiti?  As with any artistic endeavor, including writing, some is good and some is bad and much is somewhere in between.  Thank you for seeing me on the positive side of the scale.

  6. Diane Cresswell says:

    Those of us that have been Thorned are either an elite group or we forget the dark side of the Thorn and blurt out our words without thinking.  Another fine example of The Mac Attack and Lasko adventures…love the coloration – sent my mind reeling with colors…

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