Guten Morgen, Alles! Miene Liebling Literati!
Pre-occupied with writing kraut because our chief designer, Morgan Sully, just informed me yesterday that he is now in proud possession of his Aufenhaltserlaubnis. Everyone should have one! Now he can legally arbeit in Berlin for the next year!
But back here at the center of the universe–the towers that are A Wort mit You Press–our contest continues. Provide a story using twenty cliches. Hey, how hard can it be? We just had two years of listening to politicians hone that art.
KYLE Katz apparently had a ball with this.
The Inauguration Ball!
By KYLE Katz
A conveyor moved us thru the tunnel of light dropping us off at the entrance. As luck would have it, we were all dead as a doornail. I was bored to tears.
The man on the plane next to me was charming and somewhat familiar. Thank God!
“How did you get here?” I asked
“On a wing and a prayer. How bout you pretty darlin?”
My mother always warned me. “What’s it gonna take? Like a broken record…a Mack truck to hit you to get your attention. A Mack truck hit me!”
“Did it hurt?”
“No, I just didn’t see it coming.”
“Well darlin, so much for what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.”
“So let me ask you. Did yours hurt?”
“Hurt like hell! The last thing she said to me was “This will hurt me more than it will hurt you. She pulled the trigger.
“So did it hurt her more?”
“Hell no, she was happy as a clam when she pulled that trigger.”
“Why’d she do it?”
“I did not have sex with that woman!
It’s not so cut and dry, she had my balls to the wall.”
“Oh look, our clouds are arriving.”
“Snug as a bug in a rug.”
“Back off, or you’re dead meat.”
“Can’t blame a man for trying.”
“You just can’t teach an old dog new tricks. Smooth ride, enjoy it while you can”
“What do you mean?”
“The devils in the details, President Clinton, you’re in row A. Detour.”