A Message From Granny

Mr. Sully, this here’s Granny and that lazy, no good cowboy and his worthless friend, Catlow, is gone fishin’ again. Funny thing about that is about the time they disappeared, so did Charlene Bottoms. You remember her don’t you? She’s the ol’ gal they named the bar out on North Bell Street after – you …

Mr. Sully, this here’s Granny and that lazy, no good cowboy and his worthless friend, Catlow, is gone fishin’ again. Funny thing about that is about the time they disappeared, so did Charlene Bottoms. You remember her don’t you? She’s the ol’ gal they named the bar out on North Bell Street after – you know – The Town Pump? Well, anyway, since he’s not here, I guess I could write y’all somethin’ to publish while we’re a’ waitin’ for him to get back and he can do his own dang work.

The other day, me and Myrtle and Elizabeth went to the bookstore and I saw this book called Fifty Shades of Grey. So, I’m thinkin’, Well, I been wantin’ to do something different with my hair for a while and maybe there’s some ideas that an old grey haired granny could use in that book. I started to read the back cover when Myrtle hollered at me from the checkout line, “Come on. We’re leavin’.”

So I just bought the book without knowin’ anything about it. Then, when I got home and was getting ready for bed, I remembered that book about old ladies hair, so I went back to the car and got it. I crawled in bed and started reading it and I read it and I read it and before I knew it I was ‘a murmuring and a’ bitin’ my lip just like that little harlot in the book. And when I finished it, I dropped down on my knees and prayed the Lord to forgive me for reading’ such smut. Then when I stood up, I glanced out the window, I saw that old rooster sitin’ on the fence, starin’ back at me with its evil eyes glowin’ red as coals.

So, I reached down opened the window just a bit, and then I crawled into bed.

I’ll tell that lazy cowboy Gary Clark you’re a’lookin’ for him when he comes home. Might take him a day or two to find his legs and get to where he can stand up and walk, but I know he’ll be glad to know AWwYP is back up and goin’.

In the mean time, find him at www.clarkliterary.com and be sure y’a leave him some love on his guest book.

Granny

2 comments

  1. Jacquie says:

    As one granny to another, I can understand wanting to change the gray. People think you can’t do hardly anything if your hair is gray. Well, darlin, I hope you got over that nasty book, and smile some, because those folks are gonna have gray hair before long too.

    Signing off with best regards, granny Jacquie 🙂

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